I'm sitting here, on my couch, slightly stunned. I was so busy taking care of my kiddo today that it hasn't really had time to sink in... it's over. The big, huge, scary event that I've been terrified of for months is now a part of my past.
The drive up to the court in Tampa was a pain. I hate Tampa. Always have. I was armed with directions and a good idea of what it should look like. I'd been there with my mom in 2005 and I'd looked at the street view on Google maps. I was set.
Except... there was a ton of construction. Nothing looked familiar. The only thing I recognized from Google was the building with the above-road walkway thing. (Luckily, this was where I needed to go.)
I called my lawyers office. Voice mail. Damnit. I called again and hit 0 instead of the extension option. The lady that answered was super nice and very helpful. She gave me some ideas of where to look for parking and, finally, I found a metered space that was open.
I pulled in without any damage to my car or the cars around me. (I'm not very confident with my parallel parking skills. Luckily, Tampa has generous spaces!) I got the stroller out, the diaper supplies out, the toys out, and finally, got my daughter situated.
When I went to Publix the other day I got lots of $1s for the various tolls. Unfortunately, I hadn't thought to get quarters. The parking meters ONLY take quarters. And it's $1.50 per HOUR! Holy cow! I had just enough for an hour and a half and crossed my fingers that it would work out. (Side note: the town I live in does not have metered parking.)
We walked the four or five blocks to the courthouse. I'm so very grateful that I've been working on my direction sense. It's normally terrible. I figured out how to get there with no problems, even though I had to detour an extra block due to a sidewalk being closed.
There wasn't any line for security. Which was awesome, because I am clueless about that kind of thing. I had to show my photo ID, empty my pockets, unload the stroller, push her through, then go back through myself, answer questions about the contents of my purse (I have an epi-pen, which apparently got flagged as they asked about it), let them examine the stroller and it's storage areas, and then recollect all my stuff.
We hit the bathroom and then headed to the courtroom. In 2005 my mom was in the room directly across from where we went, so it was a little deja-vu like. We waited in the back. The kiddo was amazing. I mean I could not have asked her to be any better than she was. I am so very proud. (Another side note: she spiked a fever of over 102 degrees last night and was still feverish this morning w/o meds. She felt okay after Motrin kicked in, but without it was miserable.)
I watched a few cases as best I could. No one was assigned a home visit from an appraiser, which surprised me as I was terrified it would happen. Apparently MDFL is appraisal-happy according to what I've read on www.bkforum.com. The trustee was respectful. He seemed to have a little less patience for people who were wishy-washy or putting on a "poor me" show. Yet when one lady genuinely bust into tears, he was very compassionate (still in a professional kinda way).
The lawyer showed up and popped his head in, called my name softly, and then helped me get the stroller out into the main area and into a conference area. Babygirl got out and shook his hand and then was silly for a few minutes. I'm so very glad we had this time because when my mom got called up she had no idea where her lawyer was; she didn't recognize her! It was very reassuring to have talked to him beforehand.
He gave me the following advice:
- Answer all questions honestly and completely. Then shut up.
- Do not offer ANY information that's not asked for.
- Speak clearly and with authority. Give short answers.
Then he told me a few questions that the trustee might ask. (There's a really great list of these somewhere on the internet... I should find it and link to it.)
Then we went back into the room. He said we should sit up front so that the trustee would more likely call us next.
We watched one case together. At one point he leaned over and whispered, "this is exactly how not to answer questions." The lady was wishy-washy about everything. "Did you read the form that explains the difference between the types of bankruptcies?" "I think so. I'm not sure. If I did I think I read it online and not a paper handout. I'm not sure."
We got called next. My daughter was very good and he was kind to her.
I handed him my FL driver's license and my SS card. He read both. "This is case number ... with filer ... ." He swore me in. "I have in front of me .... with her DL and SS card. Please state your name and address for the record."
I did.
"No creditors are present."
He looked at my paperwork. To my surprise he asked me the least questions of anyone. He didn't ask why I had filed bankruptcy or why my husband wasn't filing with me. He confirmed the car I owned and then basically asked me if the form was complete (yes, sir), had I listed all my assets (yes, sir), did I read it before signing it (yes, sir), and so forth.
The only non-everybody question he asked me was about my business. "I see here you used to have interest in a business."
"Yes, sir."
"Are there assets remaining?"
"Yes, sir. They are listed in my paperwork."
"Could you give me an idea of what kind of assets those are?"
"A massage table and some facial equipment."
"Is that all?"
"Yes, sir."
My lawyer interjected that it was a very small business and made a few other comments along the same lines. The trustee nodded at him and looked again at my petition then moved on.
"This concludes the meeting of creditors."
If my kid hadn't been with me and been slightly distracting, I would have been done in under five minutes. It probably took ten with her.
I met with the lawyer again. He told me that they (the creditors) had a certain time period to object. He said, "they can't just say, 'hey, we don't like this!' there are only a few cases they can report against you." Then he asked if I had committed fraud, transfer of assets, etc., to which I answered no. He told me that I should get my letter of discharge in approximately 90 days and wished me luck.
We stopped at a play place in St. Pete and had lunch while we were there. She was feeling pretty good (I had re-Motrined her before we got called) and had the energy to play. It probably wasn't the best mommy move, but I needed fun and she had been SO good in the courtroom.
Then we had a long drive home. It still hadn't hit me. I talked with my mom and reassured her that she hadn't even come up in the conversation. She was greatly relieved. I'm so glad that she's supportive of me; after all, she's been through this too.
So now I'm a member of the 60-day club. Woo!
Showing posts with label assets. Show all posts
Showing posts with label assets. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Revised To Do List
Change Banks
- Change Hubby's disability deposit - Pending
Change Hubby's paycheck direct depositChange account that life insurance comes out ofChange account that YMCA membership comes out of- Change account that Netflix comes out of
- Change account that Paypal is linked to
Set up new bill pay through Landmark BankTake my name off mom's accountTake my name off our BOA joint accountClose my savings account and my checking account at BOA
Print worksheets off internet site- Complete rough draft for lawyer to look over - Mostly Complete
Copies of tax returns (2005-current just in case)Copies of closed bank account statements (6 months, just in case)- Copies of W-2s from hubby - Waiting on filing date
- Copy of hubby's disability letter - Have but not in pile of Chapter 7 stuff
- 3 months of bank statements prior to filing
- BOA
- Landmark
- ING
- Copy of Roth IRA statements - Have but not in pile of Chapter 7 paperwork
- Possession List - In progress
Prepay for cremation expensesPay off car- Purchase travel plane tickets for her yearly family trip
Friday, March 5, 2010
Cremation - Thus Far
Mom's "burying money" is at risk so we're trying to get her to prepay for her cremation (her choice) and then use the rest of the money to benefit her by paying off her car loan and freeing up $200/month for her to use for other stuff.
This is a summary of what I've learned so far:
- Prepaying funeral homes is not necessarily a great idea. They can go out of business, things you pay for may no longer be available (applies more to caskets than to urns) and the new models may be more expensive, etc.
- Direct cremation skips the funeral home entirely and is less expensive.
- There are a number of options for urns. Each pound of person's weight will equal one cubic inch of space, so use their weight to determine how large of an urn they need. (I believe a 10" urn holds up to 175 lbs of person?)
- Not all prepaid plans include transportation of the body, an urn, or a staff that's available 24/7. Many do not list prices online, though some do.
- There are far more creative ways to dispose of ashes than I had known about. However, we're going to keep her ashes and my father's ashes. I like the idea of the cremation reef, though. The diamond idea seems fairly shady (how do you know that you're getting your loved ones back?) but interesting.
This is a summary of what I've learned so far:
- Prepaying funeral homes is not necessarily a great idea. They can go out of business, things you pay for may no longer be available (applies more to caskets than to urns) and the new models may be more expensive, etc.
- Direct cremation skips the funeral home entirely and is less expensive.
- There are a number of options for urns. Each pound of person's weight will equal one cubic inch of space, so use their weight to determine how large of an urn they need. (I believe a 10" urn holds up to 175 lbs of person?)
- Not all prepaid plans include transportation of the body, an urn, or a staff that's available 24/7. Many do not list prices online, though some do.
- There are far more creative ways to dispose of ashes than I had known about. However, we're going to keep her ashes and my father's ashes. I like the idea of the cremation reef, though. The diamond idea seems fairly shady (how do you know that you're getting your loved ones back?) but interesting.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Apologies
I'm not necessarily ashamed at having to file bankruptcy. I feel like we should have known better, done better, done differently, but I'm not squirming about it. I do feel like I need to apologize constantly to my mom, though.
Why?
Because she has a lot of money that she needs to spend and it's because of me. She can't sit and enjoy the financial security. There's a large change the trustee will decide half that money can be used to pay off my creditors.
I've been pressuring her, lightly, to figure out what to do sooner rather than later. And I feel horrible about it. The longer she waits, though, the longer it will be until I can file. And that means that I might go from being 30 days late to 60 or 90.
Sometimes I feel like my mom will go along with things that she doesn't really want. I don't know why I feel that way. There's a line with parents between support and weak boundaries, and I don't know how to define where hers is.
When we bought a used car she helped us by buying one as well and we both got awesome deals. She needed a new car, and she didn't really care what she drove, but I still felt bad then. I don't want to take advantage of her. She's my mom.
Why?
Because she has a lot of money that she needs to spend and it's because of me. She can't sit and enjoy the financial security. There's a large change the trustee will decide half that money can be used to pay off my creditors.
I've been pressuring her, lightly, to figure out what to do sooner rather than later. And I feel horrible about it. The longer she waits, though, the longer it will be until I can file. And that means that I might go from being 30 days late to 60 or 90.
Sometimes I feel like my mom will go along with things that she doesn't really want. I don't know why I feel that way. There's a line with parents between support and weak boundaries, and I don't know how to define where hers is.
When we bought a used car she helped us by buying one as well and we both got awesome deals. She needed a new car, and she didn't really care what she drove, but I still felt bad then. I don't want to take advantage of her. She's my mom.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Spending Money
Because we're living paycheck to paycheck, we have ignored so many things that we actually need. I haven't had a chance to stock up as much, we've stretched out the time between replacing things that are worn out (A/C filter and toothbrush heads come to mind), and have otherwise been unable to spend much.
On the date that we file, any money that we have in our bank account is potential fair game for the trustee. Once the bankruptcy has been electronically filed, we can start saving again. Until then, however, we have a few things to spend. And that means we can catch up!!!
We had a very small amount in savings ($600), $159 of which went to the CPA. That leaves $440 or so. We're getting about $200 more than we need to file Chapter 7 from our tax return (excuse me, refund). And, because we won't be paying credit cards, we'll have about $600.
I am so excited!
My plans:
- Pay off the remaining six-month car insurance policy balance so that will free up $108 a month from now until June.
- Get both my and hubby's teeth cleaned and examined.
- If possible, fill some cavities.
- Replace the air filter in my air purifier (long overdue) and the filter in my vacuum cleaner (years overdue), and the A/C filter with a washable one so we can stop throwing money after it.
- Stock up on diapers and wipes and have a spare tube of toothpaste and deodorant and other items around. Hopefully I can match up some coupons and sales.
- Replace hubby's falling-apart undies and socks.
- Get my epi-pen filled (nut allergy).
- Oil changes for both cars.
I'm also going to spend a little more at the grocery store so that we have some food in the chest freezer and pantry. I made out pretty well at Publix's Italian Sale, but I'd like something other than canned tomatoes and tuna fish around, you know?
It feels weird not to try and hold onto every penny, but we can either get caught up on our needs or hand the money over to the trustee.
On the date that we file, any money that we have in our bank account is potential fair game for the trustee. Once the bankruptcy has been electronically filed, we can start saving again. Until then, however, we have a few things to spend. And that means we can catch up!!!
We had a very small amount in savings ($600), $159 of which went to the CPA. That leaves $440 or so. We're getting about $200 more than we need to file Chapter 7 from our tax return (excuse me, refund). And, because we won't be paying credit cards, we'll have about $600.
I am so excited!
My plans:
- Pay off the remaining six-month car insurance policy balance so that will free up $108 a month from now until June.
- Get both my and hubby's teeth cleaned and examined.
- If possible, fill some cavities.
- Replace the air filter in my air purifier (long overdue) and the filter in my vacuum cleaner (years overdue), and the A/C filter with a washable one so we can stop throwing money after it.
- Stock up on diapers and wipes and have a spare tube of toothpaste and deodorant and other items around. Hopefully I can match up some coupons and sales.
- Replace hubby's falling-apart undies and socks.
- Get my epi-pen filled (nut allergy).
- Oil changes for both cars.
I'm also going to spend a little more at the grocery store so that we have some food in the chest freezer and pantry. I made out pretty well at Publix's Italian Sale, but I'd like something other than canned tomatoes and tuna fish around, you know?
It feels weird not to try and hold onto every penny, but we can either get caught up on our needs or hand the money over to the trustee.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Our Big Issue
Okay, yikes. This is the big one.
My mother was concerned that if something happened to her that I couldn't get to her money. She wanted to make sure I had access. So, a few years ago, she put me on her accounts.
She filed bankruptcy in 2005 after my father died. She's on a very limited fixed income (SS, and as a SAHM for most of my life, it's not much) and has scraped and saved as much as she could to come up with what she calls her "burying money".
Well, she's saved more than she needs for that. And the problem is that technically it's "my" money. My name is on it. I could write a check with it or use a check card or simply transfer it to my own account at any time.
Trustees don't care about intent. It's money that they could legally take to pay off my unsecured debt.
I will NOT screw my mom over.
I asked her if she was mad. She's not. I feel horrible. However, I did actually get some advice from the lawyer about ways to protect it.
Option 1: Open a new account, without my name, and wait a year to file.
This isn't really an option for us. If nothing else works, we'll have to make it work, but I don't see us waiting that long.
Option 2: They can't really do anything if she spends the money.
According to the lawyer they can't do anything if she decides to spend the money. If she prepays her end of life expenses, pays off her car, etc. they can't do anything about it.
I hate telling her she has to spend the money she's saved. And any money she has after that is possibly at risk, at least until our filing date. After that he said we could win the lottery and they can't touch it. The filing date is the day they go by.
I hope to do some more research and come up with some better options. I'm just not sure how that will work.
My mother was concerned that if something happened to her that I couldn't get to her money. She wanted to make sure I had access. So, a few years ago, she put me on her accounts.
She filed bankruptcy in 2005 after my father died. She's on a very limited fixed income (SS, and as a SAHM for most of my life, it's not much) and has scraped and saved as much as she could to come up with what she calls her "burying money".
Well, she's saved more than she needs for that. And the problem is that technically it's "my" money. My name is on it. I could write a check with it or use a check card or simply transfer it to my own account at any time.
Trustees don't care about intent. It's money that they could legally take to pay off my unsecured debt.
I will NOT screw my mom over.
I asked her if she was mad. She's not. I feel horrible. However, I did actually get some advice from the lawyer about ways to protect it.
Option 1: Open a new account, without my name, and wait a year to file.
This isn't really an option for us. If nothing else works, we'll have to make it work, but I don't see us waiting that long.
Option 2: They can't really do anything if she spends the money.
According to the lawyer they can't do anything if she decides to spend the money. If she prepays her end of life expenses, pays off her car, etc. they can't do anything about it.
I hate telling her she has to spend the money she's saved. And any money she has after that is possibly at risk, at least until our filing date. After that he said we could win the lottery and they can't touch it. The filing date is the day they go by.
I hope to do some more research and come up with some better options. I'm just not sure how that will work.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Looking Around
I realize that I'm jumping the gun by making my list (and checking it twice) but I want to have an idea of our possessions before I have to fill out the official paperwork.
I've listed some things singly and others by grouping. I didn't list "Spatula #1" and "Spatula #2--plastic wide" but I did list some furniture separately.
My list is mostly complete. I've left off some of the things in boxes that I don't recall the contents of, but I have plenty of time to figure those out.
I'm only allowed $1000 under Florida Bankruptcy Law and I'm over that. Some things I don't mind losing at all. But others... how do I determine what's mine and what's my husband's? A question for the lawyer we pick, I realize, but it's on my mind now.
So far I'm staring at the list in a bit of shock. How is it possible for us to have almost $30,000 in credit card debt and have nothing nice to show for it?
How can was be paying $600 a month towards things we've already bought? That's three car payments! And I don't have anything nearly as nice as one car, let alone three, laying around.
Damn. It's so easy in the moment. So easy to say, "well, let's go ahead and get this. We'll pay it off when (fill in the blank)."
And when emergencies happen, and we're stretched so tight, there's no choice but to put the car repairs or emergency doctor's visit on the card.
It's been a long time since we've charged anything (car repairs over the summer, prior to that it had been at least six months if not longer) and I'm proud of us for that. But sad, really sad, too.
I've put my family in financial chains and have nothing to show for it.
I've listed some things singly and others by grouping. I didn't list "Spatula #1" and "Spatula #2--plastic wide" but I did list some furniture separately.
My list is mostly complete. I've left off some of the things in boxes that I don't recall the contents of, but I have plenty of time to figure those out.
I'm only allowed $1000 under Florida Bankruptcy Law and I'm over that. Some things I don't mind losing at all. But others... how do I determine what's mine and what's my husband's? A question for the lawyer we pick, I realize, but it's on my mind now.
So far I'm staring at the list in a bit of shock. How is it possible for us to have almost $30,000 in credit card debt and have nothing nice to show for it?
How can was be paying $600 a month towards things we've already bought? That's three car payments! And I don't have anything nearly as nice as one car, let alone three, laying around.
Damn. It's so easy in the moment. So easy to say, "well, let's go ahead and get this. We'll pay it off when (fill in the blank)."
And when emergencies happen, and we're stretched so tight, there's no choice but to put the car repairs or emergency doctor's visit on the card.
It's been a long time since we've charged anything (car repairs over the summer, prior to that it had been at least six months if not longer) and I'm proud of us for that. But sad, really sad, too.
I've put my family in financial chains and have nothing to show for it.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
First Lawyer Meeting
We decided to talk to a lawyer and most in the area offer free consultations. It was easy to schedule.
On Friday I made my way through the maze of the office park and entered the office. The waiting area was small. There was one reception desk and three waiting chairs. The woman there was very friendly and helped entertain my 2-year old daughter.
There was a stack of papers I had to read and sign. It outlined what services he was offering for free and what he was NOT offering. It made sure I knew that each 30 minutes beyond the free 20 minute consultation would cost $150. There was lots of other information as well. I was impressed that it sounded like it had been written by an actual human being.
The lawyer came out of the conference room with another client. He shook hands and asked me into the room by name.
He was very tolerant of my daughter and I managed to ask my few questions.
The time flew.
He asked what my husband makes, what I make, and how much debt we had. He reminded me student loan debt is not dischargeable and I told him I knew. He said we shouldn't have any problem filing for Chapter 7.
I asked about liquidation of assets and how that works when only one spouse files.
Our newer car, in his name only, may or may not be an issue. We received our tax credit for purchasing a house (also only in his name) and used that to pay off the car in December. If an argument can be made that half the money was mine, it might mean that something has to come out of that. The longer we wait the less likely it will be an issue.
We need to list all belongings and be as thorough as possible. He said that because our house is only work 134,000 they wouldn't be looking for us to have too many assets.
My other problem is my mom's bank account. She's almost 70, retired, and has been saving up "burying money". Because my dad passed she put me on her account. Therefore it looks as though I have $10,000 saved up. I don't. It's hers.
If I'm just an authorized signer then it's not an issue. If my social security number is on the account then it's technically "mine". "They aren't looking to take an elderly woman's last dollar from her," he said, "but it will depend on which trustee you get and how aggressive they are."
I talked with my mom about. If there's a chance her money will be taken then there's no way we're filing.
"What's the money for?"
"It's so when I die you can take care of the body without it costing you anything."
"Well, what if we look into prepaying for the cremation and the urn; it might cost less than you think and then I won't have to take care of that detail when I'm mourning. Also, you might have enough money left over to pay off your car loan and you'd have an extra $200 a month."
She thought that was a great idea and asked me to look out for a good deal.
So, we'll see. I'm going to meet with her at the bank early next week and get taken off the account. I'll have her add me back on as soon as the bankruptcy is complete.
I wish the lawyer had given me a better answer. I want to protect her assets; it's very important to me.
I did also find out that I can safely use our upcoming tax return money to pay for the lawyer.
I'm going to call on Monday to set up a few more interviews. I hope I can do them over the phone. Honestly it took me more time to unload the kid and put her back in the car than I spent with the lawyer.
Impression of the lawyer: Cool and collected, slightly reserved. Emotionally neutral. Claims to answer email questions, which is good for me. Over 30 years experience. Only board-certified bankruptcy lawyer in the area.
Cost: $1500 plus $299 filing fee. Paid half and half if necessary.
On Friday I made my way through the maze of the office park and entered the office. The waiting area was small. There was one reception desk and three waiting chairs. The woman there was very friendly and helped entertain my 2-year old daughter.
There was a stack of papers I had to read and sign. It outlined what services he was offering for free and what he was NOT offering. It made sure I knew that each 30 minutes beyond the free 20 minute consultation would cost $150. There was lots of other information as well. I was impressed that it sounded like it had been written by an actual human being.
The lawyer came out of the conference room with another client. He shook hands and asked me into the room by name.
He was very tolerant of my daughter and I managed to ask my few questions.
The time flew.
He asked what my husband makes, what I make, and how much debt we had. He reminded me student loan debt is not dischargeable and I told him I knew. He said we shouldn't have any problem filing for Chapter 7.
I asked about liquidation of assets and how that works when only one spouse files.
Our newer car, in his name only, may or may not be an issue. We received our tax credit for purchasing a house (also only in his name) and used that to pay off the car in December. If an argument can be made that half the money was mine, it might mean that something has to come out of that. The longer we wait the less likely it will be an issue.
We need to list all belongings and be as thorough as possible. He said that because our house is only work 134,000 they wouldn't be looking for us to have too many assets.
My other problem is my mom's bank account. She's almost 70, retired, and has been saving up "burying money". Because my dad passed she put me on her account. Therefore it looks as though I have $10,000 saved up. I don't. It's hers.
If I'm just an authorized signer then it's not an issue. If my social security number is on the account then it's technically "mine". "They aren't looking to take an elderly woman's last dollar from her," he said, "but it will depend on which trustee you get and how aggressive they are."
I talked with my mom about. If there's a chance her money will be taken then there's no way we're filing.
"What's the money for?"
"It's so when I die you can take care of the body without it costing you anything."
"Well, what if we look into prepaying for the cremation and the urn; it might cost less than you think and then I won't have to take care of that detail when I'm mourning. Also, you might have enough money left over to pay off your car loan and you'd have an extra $200 a month."
She thought that was a great idea and asked me to look out for a good deal.
So, we'll see. I'm going to meet with her at the bank early next week and get taken off the account. I'll have her add me back on as soon as the bankruptcy is complete.
I wish the lawyer had given me a better answer. I want to protect her assets; it's very important to me.
I did also find out that I can safely use our upcoming tax return money to pay for the lawyer.
I'm going to call on Monday to set up a few more interviews. I hope I can do them over the phone. Honestly it took me more time to unload the kid and put her back in the car than I spent with the lawyer.
Impression of the lawyer: Cool and collected, slightly reserved. Emotionally neutral. Claims to answer email questions, which is good for me. Over 30 years experience. Only board-certified bankruptcy lawyer in the area.
Cost: $1500 plus $299 filing fee. Paid half and half if necessary.
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