Thursday, April 8, 2010

It's happening again

Every once in awhile I come across a life obstacle that makes me behave differently. There is a holding pattern that happens. I realize it, curse at it a bit, forget about it for a few days, and then face it again, kicking and screaming.

The most notable time that this happened was when we were trying, and failing, to get pregnant. I didn't want to do certain things because I was going to get pregnant soon. Months later I'd be mad at myself for not being in better shape or not having flattering clothes, but surely I'd be pregnant next month, right? I'd hate to cause myself to miscarry (a very uninformed fear I had at the time) or spend money on nice clothes that wouldn't fit.

Now the bankruptcy is causing this holding pattern. Nothing feels "real" to me right now. Although nothing will change. On paper I'll be debt-free (except for student loans) and have a credit score few would envy. In my day-to-day life, however, very little is going to be different.

I'm going to make a concerted effort to use this as an opportunity to start fresh rather than be on hold.

No comments:

Post a Comment