"A Kick in the Assets" suggests finding out the values that really motivate you, rather than trying to fulfill your emotional needs by guessing.
And that makes sense.
The exercise is to make a list of your top ten values, carry it around with you, and match up your life choices with those values. Take pride in every time you work out, because your value is health, rather than just taking pride in losing the last 10 lbs. It makes sense.
Suggestions that the author makes: Freedom, Security, Honesty, Intelligence, Adventure, Learning, Resourcefulness, and about 34 others.
I'm looking at the list and trying to narrow down my top 10. If this will help me make better choices, then it's worth the time.
Love is a huge one. I want the people I love to know that I love them and to be secure in their love in return.
Relationships is another. I spend the majority of my "happy" time with other people. I love having a small group over for supper and conversation. Board games and card games could happen most nights out of the week. I like spending time with people and getting to know them.
Health... this is a huge one right now. I'm not that old and I feel like I'm falling apart. Health is my 2010 focus.
Creativity gives me a big kick. I love figuring out how to get the best deal, solving a problem, building something new, or making a piece of art for someone.
Thus far: Love, Relationships, Health, Creativity. Six more to go.
Learning should be on the list. I'm an information-gatherer. I like to take millions of bits of random knowledge, put them in the blender, and see what comes out. If I could be a professional student, that would be awesome. If I got paid for every class I got an A in and successfully completed I'd be thrilled.
Communication is a huge part of relationships, but it's important on its own as well.
Security never used to really be on the list, at least not consciously, but now that I'm aware of what that means to me it's quite a big one. Having my husband laid off two weeks before I gave birth made me realize how important this is. Owning our own home for the first time gives it new meaning.
Humor... a day without laughter is a bad day. I love making people laugh and laughing with them.
Confidence is something that I lack and I strive for. Conquering a challenging task and gaining that extra bit of confidence makes me feel like a million bucks. I would like to intentionally build my confidence.
Passion is important. That sense of "Oh my god I'm so excited about..." is thrilling and needs to come around more often in my life. I feel charged up for days when something excites me. Passion in the romantic sense is important as well.
My top 10:
Love
Relationships
Health
Creativity
Learning
Communication
Security
Humor
Confidence
Passion
I'm looking at this and wondering about whether that covers it. I have to feel useful in my relationships, so would that be a separate thing? I like to hold doors for people, give an ear to the stranger at the coffee shop, help the tourist find their way around. With friends I like to help with projects, connect them to someone else I know that can help, and so forth.
So which would I take away to add "being useful"? Also, I hate feeling obligated. I like to be generous but not feel taken advantage of. Those tie in to the being useful.
Could these all be manifestations of love? Showing someone that they are worth loving, worth taking time out for, and worth helping? That sounds like love to me.
Barnhart suggests taking that list and ordering them by importance. I think I want to sit on this for awhile before I take that next step.
Once I order them from 1-10 I need to make my wish list.
Four questions revolving around things I would like to DO, HAVE, SEE, and EXPERIENCE for each category. The author says that the more specific I can get, the better.
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Monday, March 15, 2010
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Thoughts From Your Money or Your Life: Part II
Life Energy.
Oh look. The new widget just came out. It seems fantastic. I really want it. And it's only $300.
My husband makes (let's say) $15/hour.
That means he will have worked 20 hours to give me the widget. Half of an entire work week has been spent toiling just so that I can have the latest and greatest.
The new widget cost us 20 hours of life energy. Was it worth it?
Maybe the new widget is. Maybe it's a game system that we spend thousands of hours playing, making each hour of entertainment come for pennies over its lifespan.
But maybe that $300 is from me being careless. I get pulled over and receive a $300 speeding ticket because I wasn't paying attention to where the speed limit changed and there was construction going on.
My husband now has spend twenty hours of life energy because I was merely distracted. That really sucks.
What if neither of us feel like cooking. Is our going out to eat for $30 worth two hours of his work? Wouldn't it be easier to spend fifteen minutes boiling some pasta?
This isn't really anything new or shocking, merely a reminder of a concept that's written about quite a lot in personal finance blogs and books.
But here's a twist...
Let's say that we charged that $300 gaming system and weren't able to pay it off. Assuming I have an interest rate of 15.99% (which is average for my current credit cards) and it takes me five years of payments on the cards to nail that specific purchase (I've been paying on the card but for stuff I had bought even before the $300 gaming system) there will now be $663.82 on the card. (Roughly, as that's with monthly interest compounding and not daily compounding.)
The game system has now cost us a full work week and five year's worth of stress. We probably resent the system because not only does it remind us of our poor decision making skills, it's also now available for $199. And, on top of that, the one we bought may not even be functional. What if it broke in year three?
Was the dinner out that I charged in 2002 for $35 worth $35 plus eight years of interest and stress? I couldn't even tell you what I ordered or if it was good.
I'm not trying to use this as a stick to beat myself over past purchases, but more as a yard stick for the future when credit tempts us. Once our debts are discharged it's up to us to resist. No one is going to look over our shoulders and shake their finger at us. It's going to be a test. Did we learn our lesson? Are we going to file bankruptcy again eight years from now? Hell yes, and hell no. But... it's easy looking at a computer screen, deeply in debt, in the process of filing chapter 7, to be strong and have resolve and to say things. Three years from now when the newest gadget comes out and "it's only $300" will be another story.
Oh look. The new widget just came out. It seems fantastic. I really want it. And it's only $300.
My husband makes (let's say) $15/hour.
That means he will have worked 20 hours to give me the widget. Half of an entire work week has been spent toiling just so that I can have the latest and greatest.
The new widget cost us 20 hours of life energy. Was it worth it?
Maybe the new widget is. Maybe it's a game system that we spend thousands of hours playing, making each hour of entertainment come for pennies over its lifespan.
But maybe that $300 is from me being careless. I get pulled over and receive a $300 speeding ticket because I wasn't paying attention to where the speed limit changed and there was construction going on.
My husband now has spend twenty hours of life energy because I was merely distracted. That really sucks.
What if neither of us feel like cooking. Is our going out to eat for $30 worth two hours of his work? Wouldn't it be easier to spend fifteen minutes boiling some pasta?
This isn't really anything new or shocking, merely a reminder of a concept that's written about quite a lot in personal finance blogs and books.
But here's a twist...
Let's say that we charged that $300 gaming system and weren't able to pay it off. Assuming I have an interest rate of 15.99% (which is average for my current credit cards) and it takes me five years of payments on the cards to nail that specific purchase (I've been paying on the card but for stuff I had bought even before the $300 gaming system) there will now be $663.82 on the card. (Roughly, as that's with monthly interest compounding and not daily compounding.)
The game system has now cost us a full work week and five year's worth of stress. We probably resent the system because not only does it remind us of our poor decision making skills, it's also now available for $199. And, on top of that, the one we bought may not even be functional. What if it broke in year three?
Was the dinner out that I charged in 2002 for $35 worth $35 plus eight years of interest and stress? I couldn't even tell you what I ordered or if it was good.
I'm not trying to use this as a stick to beat myself over past purchases, but more as a yard stick for the future when credit tempts us. Once our debts are discharged it's up to us to resist. No one is going to look over our shoulders and shake their finger at us. It's going to be a test. Did we learn our lesson? Are we going to file bankruptcy again eight years from now? Hell yes, and hell no. But... it's easy looking at a computer screen, deeply in debt, in the process of filing chapter 7, to be strong and have resolve and to say things. Three years from now when the newest gadget comes out and "it's only $300" will be another story.
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Thoughts From Your Money or Your Life
I've just started reading the most recent pile of books. Here are my current "A-ha" moments from Your Money or Your Life by Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin.
"To Buy is Right" around page 18 in this edition. "Even the language of modern economics promotes consumerism. What else would we do with 'disposable income' besides dispose of it..."
Hmm. I never really thought about this before. I don't have a "disposable income" label on my Open Office but when I label it mentally, that's what I put on it.
Disposable income. We have the ability to dispose of it.
What if instead of "disposable" income it was "save-able" income. Or "improvement income". Maybe I should say to myself, "this income is earmarked to improve our life in the long-run. Whether that means making the house more energy efficient, paying off a debt, or increasing my emergency fund." Could simply changing the way I think about this money change the way I spend (or not spend) it?
Another interesting point: A progress report in 1929 by the Herbert Hoover Committee on Recent Economic Changes came up with a strategy that was new. A survey had been conducted and showed that "wants are almost insatiable; that one want satisfied makes way for another. The conclusion is that economically we have a boundless field before us; that there are new wants which will make way endlessly for newer wants, as fast as they are satisfied."
The beginning of the book also cites other studies that showed people of the income ranges studied were no happier at the top of the scale (over $4k/month income) than at the bottom of the scale ($1k/month income). Also with the giant leap in conveniences (dishwashers, A/C, two cars, etc.) Americans weren't any happier than before they had all the gadgetry. More is not better.
I've been thinking about this in my own way for a long time. It seems as though every time I get some long-awaited for object I suddenly find something else to save for and research. My favorite author just came out with a new book in the series that I love. I read it and now am jonesing for something else. We just harvested 3 lbs of tomatoes from our container garden; I'm already mentally moving on to "when are the rest of my plants going to produce?"
My father once said about my sister, "She used to drive me nuts. We'd be standing in line at the county fair and she'd already be picking out the next ride and would be getting anxious to move on to the next thing before we even went on the ride we were standing in line for."
That statement hurt me because I recognized that was true for me as well. I see that in myself and many of my friends.
I'm excited to see what other little gems are hidden in these pages.
"To Buy is Right" around page 18 in this edition. "Even the language of modern economics promotes consumerism. What else would we do with 'disposable income' besides dispose of it..."
Hmm. I never really thought about this before. I don't have a "disposable income" label on my Open Office but when I label it mentally, that's what I put on it.
Disposable income. We have the ability to dispose of it.
What if instead of "disposable" income it was "save-able" income. Or "improvement income". Maybe I should say to myself, "this income is earmarked to improve our life in the long-run. Whether that means making the house more energy efficient, paying off a debt, or increasing my emergency fund." Could simply changing the way I think about this money change the way I spend (or not spend) it?
Another interesting point: A progress report in 1929 by the Herbert Hoover Committee on Recent Economic Changes came up with a strategy that was new. A survey had been conducted and showed that "wants are almost insatiable; that one want satisfied makes way for another. The conclusion is that economically we have a boundless field before us; that there are new wants which will make way endlessly for newer wants, as fast as they are satisfied."
The beginning of the book also cites other studies that showed people of the income ranges studied were no happier at the top of the scale (over $4k/month income) than at the bottom of the scale ($1k/month income). Also with the giant leap in conveniences (dishwashers, A/C, two cars, etc.) Americans weren't any happier than before they had all the gadgetry. More is not better.
I've been thinking about this in my own way for a long time. It seems as though every time I get some long-awaited for object I suddenly find something else to save for and research. My favorite author just came out with a new book in the series that I love. I read it and now am jonesing for something else. We just harvested 3 lbs of tomatoes from our container garden; I'm already mentally moving on to "when are the rest of my plants going to produce?"
My father once said about my sister, "She used to drive me nuts. We'd be standing in line at the county fair and she'd already be picking out the next ride and would be getting anxious to move on to the next thing before we even went on the ride we were standing in line for."
That statement hurt me because I recognized that was true for me as well. I see that in myself and many of my friends.
I'm excited to see what other little gems are hidden in these pages.
Monday, March 8, 2010
From the Library Today
I got the following books from the library today. I'm trying to get my post-CH7 budget in order and educate myself so I don't screw up again.
As I read each I'm going to try and note quotes or thoughts that I have that were particularly relevant to me. This isn't so much a book review as it is a "what I got from the book" type of post.
After all, this blog isn't just about the stress and decisions and mistakes that lead up to filing bankruptcy. It's also about making life changes that will help us make the better choices.
Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace Revisited
Dominguez's Your Money or Your Life
Nemeth's The Energy of Money
Barnhart's A Kick in the Assets
As I read each I'm going to try and note quotes or thoughts that I have that were particularly relevant to me. This isn't so much a book review as it is a "what I got from the book" type of post.
After all, this blog isn't just about the stress and decisions and mistakes that lead up to filing bankruptcy. It's also about making life changes that will help us make the better choices.
Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace Revisited
Dominguez's Your Money or Your Life
Nemeth's The Energy of Money
Barnhart's A Kick in the Assets
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Books
A few days ago I mentioned a book called Maxed Out. I also mentioned a few others.
I haven't opened Raising Financially Fit Kids yet.
I started Credit Card Nation. The author of Maxed Out makes a comment about CCN, basically saying that it's a dry read. I agree.
It's overly-complicated. I hate it when I feel like an author is trying to impress me by using as many large words as possible in a sentence. I have a large vocabulary, so it's not that I don't know what the words mean... there's a flow and ease of reading that allows me to absorb the text much more quickly when it's not written in an overly-complicated manner. It's part of the reason I love reading blogs. I love the personal and conversational tone.
Maxed Out was written so that it was easy (and amusing) to read. Credit Card Nation is sitting on my bookcase. I haven't read past the first three pages and I probably won't.
I'm about a third of the way through Getting Credit After Bankruptcy. Hmm. Where to start on this one.
(Provided so you can see what book I'm talking about; this is one I don't recommend buying.)
First of all I'm not impressed. I've even outright laughed, scoffed, and harrumphed while reading. The sole qualifications of the authors seem to be that they went out and gained credit after filing bankruptcy. And while "been there, done that" anecdotal evidence is often important to me when getting advice from a friend, I'm not sure it qualifies me to trust someone to my financial future.
Some sections of the book seem downright thrown in as an after-thought. For example there are 32 suggestions on how to save money. These are clearly outdated and random. Sending letters rather than calling is no longer a good strategy. Giving up the beloved family pet is a rather callous suggestion. Whole books and blogs have been devoted to saving money... it's a topic with far more scope than a two-page chapter can cover.
The author offers biased opinions that are offensive at times. Not really offensive, and not enough to make me not want to finish the book, but I don't feel that the personal bias adds anything to the experience. (Example: Complaining about driving an American-made car, because that's all they could get approved for.)
Finally (and remember this is not a whole book review, just my first impressions), I think the advice goes against my personal goals for bankrutpcy. I DO want to reestablish credit, of course, but I'm not going to run out and lease a car. Leasing a car is one of the first action steps (after opening a checking and savings account, getting a credit card, etc.) the author recommends. After that is getting a home-equity loan.
Their list of qualifications (their approved credit) is long and impressive. Getting approved for and charging furniture and, later in a different establishment, a camera? They eschewed going cash-only though it was their initial goal, but it seems overboard. It just strikes me like all of these things would be horrible temptation for someone who can't control their spending. How many open lines of credit do we need? How many cards?
Again - I'm no expert. I've changed my opinions about a lot of things several times as I've learned more. I shake my head and laugh at my prior ignorance. So I might be judging this one too harshly.
Links to the other books I mentioned:
I haven't opened Raising Financially Fit Kids yet.
I started Credit Card Nation. The author of Maxed Out makes a comment about CCN, basically saying that it's a dry read. I agree.
It's overly-complicated. I hate it when I feel like an author is trying to impress me by using as many large words as possible in a sentence. I have a large vocabulary, so it's not that I don't know what the words mean... there's a flow and ease of reading that allows me to absorb the text much more quickly when it's not written in an overly-complicated manner. It's part of the reason I love reading blogs. I love the personal and conversational tone.
Maxed Out was written so that it was easy (and amusing) to read. Credit Card Nation is sitting on my bookcase. I haven't read past the first three pages and I probably won't.
I'm about a third of the way through Getting Credit After Bankruptcy. Hmm. Where to start on this one.
(Provided so you can see what book I'm talking about; this is one I don't recommend buying.)
First of all I'm not impressed. I've even outright laughed, scoffed, and harrumphed while reading. The sole qualifications of the authors seem to be that they went out and gained credit after filing bankruptcy. And while "been there, done that" anecdotal evidence is often important to me when getting advice from a friend, I'm not sure it qualifies me to trust someone to my financial future.
Some sections of the book seem downright thrown in as an after-thought. For example there are 32 suggestions on how to save money. These are clearly outdated and random. Sending letters rather than calling is no longer a good strategy. Giving up the beloved family pet is a rather callous suggestion. Whole books and blogs have been devoted to saving money... it's a topic with far more scope than a two-page chapter can cover.
The author offers biased opinions that are offensive at times. Not really offensive, and not enough to make me not want to finish the book, but I don't feel that the personal bias adds anything to the experience. (Example: Complaining about driving an American-made car, because that's all they could get approved for.)
Finally (and remember this is not a whole book review, just my first impressions), I think the advice goes against my personal goals for bankrutpcy. I DO want to reestablish credit, of course, but I'm not going to run out and lease a car. Leasing a car is one of the first action steps (after opening a checking and savings account, getting a credit card, etc.) the author recommends. After that is getting a home-equity loan.
Their list of qualifications (their approved credit) is long and impressive. Getting approved for and charging furniture and, later in a different establishment, a camera? They eschewed going cash-only though it was their initial goal, but it seems overboard. It just strikes me like all of these things would be horrible temptation for someone who can't control their spending. How many open lines of credit do we need? How many cards?
Again - I'm no expert. I've changed my opinions about a lot of things several times as I've learned more. I shake my head and laugh at my prior ignorance. So I might be judging this one too harshly.
Links to the other books I mentioned:
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Maxed Out
On Monday I got a bunch of books from the library. Credit Card Nation, Rebuilding Credit After Bankruptcy, and Raising Financially Fit Kids.
I started with Maxed out and finished it on Wednesday.
I highly recommend it. I was shocked and amazed by some of the things I read about the spiral of debt, predatory lending, "deadbeat" customers, pawn shops vs. credit cards and banks, legislation, national debt, and other topics.
This is an amazon.com link but I found my copy at the library and highly recommend reading for free whenever you can. One of my old budget-busters was books. If I walked into a Barnes and Noble I'd spend up to $100 at the drop of a hat on books. Now I pay about $30 a year in late fees and read between 75-100 books a year. Significant savings, and I recommend it.
I started with Maxed out and finished it on Wednesday.
I highly recommend it. I was shocked and amazed by some of the things I read about the spiral of debt, predatory lending, "deadbeat" customers, pawn shops vs. credit cards and banks, legislation, national debt, and other topics.
This is an amazon.com link but I found my copy at the library and highly recommend reading for free whenever you can. One of my old budget-busters was books. If I walked into a Barnes and Noble I'd spend up to $100 at the drop of a hat on books. Now I pay about $30 a year in late fees and read between 75-100 books a year. Significant savings, and I recommend it.
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